How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
