my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Randomize