Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I need a beard to bite.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
