dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
So gin and wine won't be happening again
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
