Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
