Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
