she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
