love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
NoShamevember. You game?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
