with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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