So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
