K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
