508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
