vagina is talking i cant
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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