She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize