grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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