And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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