I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I feel like a drive thru vagina
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
