I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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