Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
