I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
