I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
All I want is dick and wine.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
