yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
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