Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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