Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
