Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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