Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
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