What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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