And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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