I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
