Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
