why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
