Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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