I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
