Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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