Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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