Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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