guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize