I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
