So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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