saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize