He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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