my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
