Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
