He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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