Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
