sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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