I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
