cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
