so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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