Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
