Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
